if only for the mentals.
i posted a link to this very blog as a status update... see if you can guess which commenter is the mental.
(status update linking to blog goes here)
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
the spearman experiment
SooooOOOoooo tonight the spearman experiment was on tv.
It's shit. don't watch it.
this is why.
1. it's EXACTLY like 20 to 1, but there are 15 items on the list that "you" voted for. I don't think anyone I know voted, though, because the show is clearly made for spastics.
2. tonight was the fifteen songs you should never have on your iPod. Good work guys! just put the word "iPod" in there somewhere and you're sure to rake (i said RAKE) in the generation y-ers. But instead of it being 15 really shit songs that nobody has on their iPods, it was almost all songs that everyone who has ever been to anything fun in life would have on their iPods. I know that i'm one of those people who can only fit like 2% of their itunes library on their iPod, so I have to choose carefully. and I always think, "if i'm ever in a life and death situation where gangsters are holding me ransom and the only way to get out is to put on a fun playlist that everyone will like, i better put this song on the ol' 'pod."
3. the first 3 minutes of the show have celebrities (and by "celebrities" they mean "people who require their name and a little discription of why they are famous in a title bar underneath them") talking about the songs and snippits of the songs that you're about to see again anyway.... YOU'RE GIVING AWAY ALL THE CLUES!!!!!! if the spearman experiment was on my team for Taboo, we'd totally win. but then it's just a matter of which order they go in. which really isn't enough to hold my interest.
4. magda sdlafkjsd;lkfjasdski (also she pronounces her own name wrong, i'm sure of it - shoo bine ski? i don't think that's right.) does these really shit little skits where she's not funny OR Sharon Strzelecki.
so yeah don't watch it if you're cool.
1 star.
It's shit. don't watch it.
this is why.
1. it's EXACTLY like 20 to 1, but there are 15 items on the list that "you" voted for. I don't think anyone I know voted, though, because the show is clearly made for spastics.
2. tonight was the fifteen songs you should never have on your iPod. Good work guys! just put the word "iPod" in there somewhere and you're sure to rake (i said RAKE) in the generation y-ers. But instead of it being 15 really shit songs that nobody has on their iPods, it was almost all songs that everyone who has ever been to anything fun in life would have on their iPods. I know that i'm one of those people who can only fit like 2% of their itunes library on their iPod, so I have to choose carefully. and I always think, "if i'm ever in a life and death situation where gangsters are holding me ransom and the only way to get out is to put on a fun playlist that everyone will like, i better put this song on the ol' 'pod."
3. the first 3 minutes of the show have celebrities (and by "celebrities" they mean "people who require their name and a little discription of why they are famous in a title bar underneath them") talking about the songs and snippits of the songs that you're about to see again anyway.... YOU'RE GIVING AWAY ALL THE CLUES!!!!!! if the spearman experiment was on my team for Taboo, we'd totally win. but then it's just a matter of which order they go in. which really isn't enough to hold my interest.
4. magda sdlafkjsd;lkfjasdski (also she pronounces her own name wrong, i'm sure of it - shoo bine ski? i don't think that's right.) does these really shit little skits where she's not funny OR Sharon Strzelecki.
so yeah don't watch it if you're cool.
1 star.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
playing chess with a friend.
today, a friend of mine dragged out her chess set and said to me "do you want to have sex" ... just kdding, she obviously asked me if i wanted to play chess. i did.
so when setting up we just went over a few of the basic rules like "rooking" and "what your pawn (porno) turns into if it reaches the back fence...." etc.
then we started playing.
she was saying how she is awesome at chess and how she just won chess on a video game she was playing.
then i moved my queen to a position where it would be easy to get to her king.
it was then that the confusion started. she thought the point of the game was to capture or "checkmate" the queen.
back and forth of "no i don't think so" "yeah you're wrong" and "i'll google it."
we both googled it.
i won the argument.
we reset and played again.
i won that game too.
five stars for me winning
two stars for whoever taught her to play chess.
so when setting up we just went over a few of the basic rules like "rooking" and "what your pawn (porno) turns into if it reaches the back fence...." etc.
then we started playing.
she was saying how she is awesome at chess and how she just won chess on a video game she was playing.
then i moved my queen to a position where it would be easy to get to her king.
it was then that the confusion started. she thought the point of the game was to capture or "checkmate" the queen.
back and forth of "no i don't think so" "yeah you're wrong" and "i'll google it."
we both googled it.
i won the argument.
we reset and played again.
i won that game too.
five stars for me winning
two stars for whoever taught her to play chess.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
"5 Black dresses and a white lily", or as i like to call it "5 dumb sluts in a shit play"
this is the worst piece of shit i've seen since your mum got drunk and pooed in the sink. (now THAT would make a good 10 minute play!)
synopsis: one girl's mother's funeral is today, the girl and three of her friends are just standing around being lame on stage, then one girl comes along and is accused of being a slut. massive (really shitly choreographed) scrag fight ensues.
As part of the "short and sweet" festival in Brisbane this year, I didn't really expect any of the plays to blow my socks off. I knew there would be some mediocre plays(The history of the world in 7 1/2 minutes) thrown in for good measure. But because my mind actually WAS blown by Eastertoon, Sushiwooshiwoo, and the one about inverted nipples..... it just made this "5 black dresses and a white lily" one seem that much shitter. I really wish that the 5 girls in black dresses on stage were the only ones who had to watch this shitty script come to life. but what surprises me was that people were laughing along at the "funny" parts..... you don't encourage that type of retardedness, that's like giving treats to a dog that keeps licking an electric fence. anyway it just got to the point where i was laughing AT them. I was trying really hard not to, but with lines like "let's never fight again" and "it was supposed to be her day" said with sincere conviction, i just couldn't contain my audible "PPPPPFFFFFFFTTTTT HAHAHAHHAHA WHAT THE F...?" 's.
zero stars
this was shit.
synopsis: one girl's mother's funeral is today, the girl and three of her friends are just standing around being lame on stage, then one girl comes along and is accused of being a slut. massive (really shitly choreographed) scrag fight ensues.
As part of the "short and sweet" festival in Brisbane this year, I didn't really expect any of the plays to blow my socks off. I knew there would be some mediocre plays(The history of the world in 7 1/2 minutes) thrown in for good measure. But because my mind actually WAS blown by Eastertoon, Sushiwooshiwoo, and the one about inverted nipples..... it just made this "5 black dresses and a white lily" one seem that much shitter. I really wish that the 5 girls in black dresses on stage were the only ones who had to watch this shitty script come to life. but what surprises me was that people were laughing along at the "funny" parts..... you don't encourage that type of retardedness, that's like giving treats to a dog that keeps licking an electric fence. anyway it just got to the point where i was laughing AT them. I was trying really hard not to, but with lines like "let's never fight again" and "it was supposed to be her day" said with sincere conviction, i just couldn't contain my audible "PPPPPFFFFFFFTTTTT HAHAHAHHAHA WHAT THE F...?" 's.
zero stars
this was shit.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Pussycat Sluts and Lady Gaga May 19, 2009.
WHAT A BUNCH OF SLUTS.
and lady gaga is a terrible dancer.
one star.
(and no that star is not nicole sherzingzkjflakdsjer, that one star is half for kimberly wyatt's flexibility and half for having fire on stage)
and lady gaga is a terrible dancer.
one star.
(and no that star is not nicole sherzingzkjflakdsjer, that one star is half for kimberly wyatt's flexibility and half for having fire on stage)
The Timely Death of Victor Blott
If you didn't get to see "The Timely Death of Victor Blott" at QUT's Woodward Theatre, you missed out on seeing my favourite piece of theatre this year.
It's rare for something at QUT to not be a wanky "guide to contemporary performance" checklist:
- symbolic use of the colour red, check!
- no set design or thought put into creating an imaginative space, check!
- use of powerpoint presentation, check!
- me sitting the audience being confused and tired, check!
but Victor Blott was all kinds of rad.... but mostly the theatre kind of rad.
five stars.
(i know, wow)
It's rare for something at QUT to not be a wanky "guide to contemporary performance" checklist:
- symbolic use of the colour red, check!
- no set design or thought put into creating an imaginative space, check!
- use of powerpoint presentation, check!
- me sitting the audience being confused and tired, check!
but Victor Blott was all kinds of rad.... but mostly the theatre kind of rad.
five stars.
(i know, wow)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Ohhhh this is dick hole ass gayds!?
aren't you only supposed to comment if you have something interesting or witty to say? Your tedious comments are so not worth commenting on and your hellishly introspective comments are akin to a 2 year old baby screaming, "look at me!!!" Yes we're all looking, very good.
i only do status updates for you. I really only want to hear your opinion ... Read Moreon things. seeing as you are so witty and interesting. it's very good that you can use dictionary.com but really, there's no need for an essay every time you want to express yourself in a vain hope to impress others. don't you have real friends to interact with?
they're just sitting on the internet waiting for you to comment retardedly on someone's status update so they can counter-comment. Their "an effwit just commented on your friend's status" application probably just isn't working.
if I'm not 'that other fag', I demand to be
Did you think you were being clever when you copied my comment word for word and used it back at me? You say, "your tedious comments are not worth commenting on" and "there's no need for an essay." Well, you commented on my comment. And your essay, I mean comment, was longer than mine.
I don't need to use dictionary.com, I'm just smarter than you.
Sarcasm and sincerity in the same breath, you're confusing yourself into a stupor! Calm down pussy cat.
I have real friends to interact with, I promise. I just came back from touch football. Ever heard of it? But honestly, whenever I'm annoyed at something I just comment on your updates because it makes me feel better to demoralise an idiot like you. Despite your outwardly bullish demeanour and oh-so-lame comebacks, I know in my heart of hearts that you're crying at home.
Peace and Love,
Braidy
this fella is pretty keen on himself
braidy gay-dy aids-y.
ok i didn't read all of that cos it was boring after you tried to deconstruct my comment.
but anyway, thanks for playing!... Read More
also michael, i think "that other fag" is kyle.
i hope nick can find a place in his heart for me! it was hard to track you down after you took your profile off hotmanpie.com, bro
books documenting 'full-on faggots'? aren't they just your phonebooks?
oh special. michael seriously, just leave it. you'll never get between nicholas and kyle. one nicholas sets his sights on something he just HAS to have it. he's a bit like veruca salt. (not the band.)
HEYO!!!!
Hey guys, when did the dream of becoming a world famous actor transmutate into the reality of becoming a high school drama teacher working and living beyond the black stump?
Later C***s
omg seacrest OUT!
later! good chats babe LOlziez! xoxoxo
by the way braids, 'transmutate' is not a word. 'mutate' is, but the 'trans' is redundant. 'transmutate' is actually the name of a transformer. ELOQUENCE FAIL
Ever heard the Tool lyrics, "... Read Moretransmutate these leaden crutches into gold?" Yeall well it's from the song, "the grudge." just little things that I pick up from time to time, that you're obviously oblivious to.
HAHAHAHAHA!!! SYKESEEEEZZ! hilarious. HAHA p.s just pointing out that zoey made the dictionary.com reference first...but no you are totally in the right AIDSY
Nicholas Braid
Michael
that's rich, nick. if it wasn't for stupid people banding together, you never would have been born
and yes, the outcome was 'pretty fucking hilarious' that time too
guessed it?